“Down to Margate, you can keep the Costa Brava
I’m telling ya mate I’d rather have a day down Margate
With all me family.”
Except we weren’t.
We definitely weren’t.
Then we might have.
But we didn’t.
Might not scan, but full marks for accuracy.
I had, like a loyal, selfless and thoughtful TLF agreed to forego a seaside away day with the Mighty Saints in favour of some quality time with Mr TLF at a tiny caravan with no mod cons but fantastic views of the finest English countryside. Except by Thursday evening Mr TLF had taken a look at the weather forecast and over-ruled the planned trip, thinking that hypothermia does generally take the edge off quality time.
I was like a striker returning back to the side after a long layoff a bit slow to react to this opportunity. The Margate goalmouth was wide open……but it was a good three hours before I even attempted to stab the ball home and suggest an alternative would be that we went Margate.
“No”, came the short but very clear response.
Maybe I shouldn’t have sung it….
That episode reminded me of a recent survey by SportsBettingOnline, which I am sure was purely in the interests of academic research and not a promotional tool to advertise their gambling-wares. It looked at the lengths to which football fans will go to make sure they don’t miss a game. Apparently 27% of Lesta fans admitted to lying to their partner in order to get to see a game. We were some of the less likely fibbers apparently.
Personally I think honesty and direct communication is essential in a relationship. Like with Margate. I could have said, “well if the caravan is off then I’ll probably spend the day out, undertaking charitable acts for worthy causes and be home ooh the same time as if I’d gone to say er…Margate.” But no. I took the decision on my little TLF chin. Important to be clear where you stand, like when Mr TLF asked whether I would be working when I was working from home on Thursday. I think my reply “which of the three effing words, ‘working’,’from’, and ‘home’ do you not effing understand?” was fairly unambiguous.
Being a stubborn if honest TLF I did of course on the day of the game employ a couple of attempts at reversing the Margate outcome. Sadly two renditions of Chas n Dave’s finest got me nowhere. I admitted defeat:
TLF: Oh well at least if we’re not going then we won’t miss the launch show of Strictly Come Dancing 2015.
Mr TLF: Is it too late to go to Margit?