They think it’s all over…It is neuer!

Boris Becker, Martin Heidegger, Steffi Graf, General von Hindenburg, Angela Merkel….can you hear me, Angela Merkel, your boys took one hell of a beating!

It’s shame there isn’t a really good word for ‘the experience of pleasure that is derived from another’s misfortune’. It would need to be a foreign word to provide that extra level of satisfaction. Ah well, you can’t have everything.

Thanks to South Korea, TLF’s world cup shock exit bus has a passenger after all and in the most amusing, dramatic and un-German-like circumstances. Two spectacularly late goals, one where I am sure the Germans wanted to invoke the Monty Python philosophy football sketch lines.

The Germans are disputing it! Hegel is arguing that the reality is merely an a priori adjunct of non-naturalistic ethics. Kant, via the categorical imperative, is holding that ontologic exists only in the imagination, and Marx is claiming that it was offside.

But the genius of Python is no match for VAR or indeed Toni Kroos and his assist for South Korea’s first goal. And a second goal borne out of the calamitous approach of Marcus Neuer…and that’s a kind description, my mate Chris Sutton of Radio 5 Live did not hold back.

Meanwhile Mexican fans were going through the wringer as their team surrendered to Sweden and they no doubt spent more time refreshing their phones than watching the game. Wikipedia was quickly in action last night, with Cho Hyun-Woo, South Korea’s keeper now being described as a ‘Mexican Saviour or One True God’. All this must have made qualification extra sweet for Sweden after the taunting by Germany’s bench on Satday following the Kroos free kick. Well not the bench obviously, the occupants of said seating.

If you read the papers today, the grown up ones anyway, the writers are telling us why we should have seen expected Germany’s failure to qualify for the next round (for the first time since 1938!). A divided camp, a reliance on reputation not form (Neuer for example has hardly played at all this season) and an arrogance that they could just turn up and win the thing apparently. Funnily none of this showed up in the pre-tournament guides I read, but hey I’m too happy to be picky.

I imagine that Joachim Low isn’t feeling the lurve today (BOOMBOOM!)

For the avoidance of doubt, it’s not a Germany thing. Just like the last three World Cup tournaments, there is something vaguely satisfying about the world cup holders crashing and burning. It’s entertaining and it is of course something that as an Ingurland fan I have never experienced. Talking of which. NO let’s be chronological about this.

The evening games weren’t unpleasant to watch/listen to, but they felt a bit ‘after the Lord Mayor’s world cup shock exit’ to be honest. Brazil seemed to move up half a gear and Costa Rica were delighted to finally score some goals and leave with a point.

Today we finish off the group stages – doesn’t time fly etc. Group H, has three teams still in the mix as they say in media circles. Japan only need a point and they face the so far disappointing Poland. Having said that members of the ‘nul points after two group games’ club have so far in the last Group games gone to great lengths to not leave Russia in a pointless state and so there might yet be a twist this afternoon.

Now, where was I before I so rudely interrupted myself in the interests of chronology? Oh yes. The home nation, Blighty. Can I recommend against boarding, just yet, the “because Gareth Southgate is a more genial and open-minded Ingurland manager than we have seen for many a year, has made the players into a bunch of people we quite like and Germany are out we will win the World Cup” bus? It is lovely to be facing the last group game without the need for nail biting, but so far we have played two teams who aren’t that good. Yes of course I want us to win the ruddy thing, but a sense of perspective isn’t a bad idea, particularly if we don’t want to experience a hefty dose of the thing that there isn’t a really good word for, but if there was it would need to be foreign.

Should we try and not win against Belgium or kick the bejeezus out of them so we don’t top the group as a result of more yellow cards? Personally I’d recommend play the best we can and see what happens. I am a little disappointed to hear that in the event of it being all square at the top of Group G, FIFA officials will draw lots to see who is officially top of the group. I do think there is an element of absurdity in that wording. It feels like an attempt to give a sense of occasion to a minion from FIFA pulling out a single piece of screwed up paper from an official FIFA branded baseball cap. Personally I would like to see the two managers engage in a best of three scissors, paper, stone, on the centre spot at full time.

Sit back, and rarely for Ingurland…RELAX

Nureyev Fox

National anthem fact fest: Senegal
Pincez tous vos koras, frappez les balafons known also as Le Lion rouge was composed by Herbert Pepper, with lyrics by Leopold Sedar Senghor.
“Sound, all of you, your Koras, Beat the drums, The red Lion has roared”
Chant of the day – Polish
You don’t know what you’re doing
Nie wiesz, co robisz

Check these out if paragraphs one and four mean nowt to you.

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One Response to They think it’s all over…It is neuer!

  1. Bob Stanley says:

    I still remember England going out as champions in 1970. I was 10 years old and it genuinely felt like the end of the world, not just the World Cup. So, much as I can empathise with any modern-day German children that doesn’t diminish my feelings of that word you alluded to in any way.

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