That cruel Mistress Ms DE Feat, close cousin of the Fat Lady (that sings) made an unwelcome visit to Clarence Park this weekend. There may be those who choose to point the brutal finger of blame at yours truly for this result, tying it in with my deviation from the usual pre-match meal combined with my surfeit of single magpie sightings that morning. Personally however I would argue that it was down to the players having what is sometimes described as a ‘bad day at the office’. Admittedly so far in my career none of my bad days at my office (of which there are plenty) have ever led to me removing my shirt and chucking it on the floor a la Richard Graham, but then again my boss has never substituted me 30 minutes into a meeting….
Whomsoever the fickle digit of blame does end up giving a sharp jab in the ribs to, the result did put a dampener on the usual match day bonhomie. Normally the fog of four Stellas is enough to keep the spirits up but on this occasion the lacklustre-ness (don’t care if that is a word or not. I like it) seemed to seep from pitch to terraces. You know it is bad when the best Davy Mack can muster is, “well at least it’s not raining.” Still for most of us it wasn’t our first visit in several years…unlike Mark a lifelong supporter over from Palestine. Nothing says ‘welcome home’ quite like a 3-1 defeat to a team in the bottom third of the table. I’ll put his insistence on calling the Midlands, ‘the Void’ down to disappointment rather than a lack of cultural and geographic respect.
The happy throng on the terraces
The excitement is just too much for Ron
Meanwhile over in the east of the aforementioned Void, TATTPIB were continuing their seemingly unstoppable march back to the Premiership in my absence. This time last year they were embarking on a disastrous run that meant squeaking into the play-offs via goal difference, but this year with my back turned they are going great guns. So far that has been something I have smiled benignly about, “Yes, HAHA. Isn’t it funny,” I say whenever a ‘friend’ brings up their success and my absence going hand in hand. But a first home league defeat since September for the mighty Saints did make me wince a bit. Not so much in a “Oh I wish I was at Lesta not Clarence Park” kind of a way but more in a ‘thoughtless gits’ kind of a way. I mentioned this upon my return home, unaware of the Mr TLF rant that was about to be unleashed. Fortunately I had a pen and the back of an envelope handy and got it all down, although my Stella handwriting is probably not the most legible, it went roughly like this:
“I spent years watching LCFC ponce about, not unhappily.” (I think he meant he was happy rather than the team or indeed the ‘poncing’ were happy). “I was quite content, thinking to myself that after the years of famine there would be some good stuff. And now the calves are fatted and the crows have come home to roost I don’t get to go and see them because you’re not going. So look at it from my point of view. I’ve got a grievance.”
That’s his problem you know….bottles it all up. Never tells you what’s on his mind
Match stats:
St Albans 1 Truro City 3
Attendance 794
Raffle tickets purchased 10 Prizes won 0. On this occasion am quite grateful. I had the right number but the wrong colour ticket for the £10 Morrisons voucher. I was actually quite relieved. You see this would have been a significant WMD in the ongoing battle of Morrisons (Mr TLF) v Any supermarket but Morrisons (TLF)
Losing golden goal tickets purchased 2
Bacon fries consumed 1 packet
Additional item from ATB 1. A bacon and cheese burger. I know…I shouldn’t have dabbled again with this unlucky item. Once it was the last minute equaliser burger. Now it is the lacklustre home defeat burger.
Lager consumed 4 pints Stella
Thing I Learnt This Week
Wiseness is not a word. When I said it I meant wisdom. Honest
Oxford Dictionary Fox